I can't wait. Counting the Sorrys. Only 3700 before I leave.
06.08.2009 - 06.09.2009 17 °C
Tomorrow will be four weeks until my arrival in Kuala Lumpur and the damp sands of time don't fall through my hour glass of anticipation fast enough.
I've sorted out my finance. I’ve got my travel books. I've got some travel trousers with so many zips and pockets that it will take the best part of a day to locate my change. God knows what will happen when I need the loo! I've been watching Rick Stein's gastronomically odyssey around the far East and can almost taste the sea food. The nurse has kindly advised me on the jabs required for the Cameroon. I pointed out that Cambodia, although sharing the same first three letters is not by default on the same continent.
To my surprise I have been moved at work to the "I demand To Speak To A Manager" team. Some misguided belief that I can calm customers down has meant a transfer to the Russian front of Call Centre's - the escalated calls department. This is where the uncaged rabid beasts of Mrs Livid from Liverpool, Mr Disgusted from Dundee, Mrs Outraged from Oswestry are released into our domain. The standard call centre agent cannot handle them so it is left to us lion tamers.
It will soon however be over. No more fractured, convoluted, totally inept IT systems and processes causing misery to customers/employees alike. No more false empathy. No more "I will feedback your concerns", "or as a gesture of apology". No more people complaining that their duvet is too noisy or that one of the Sunflowers in the bouquet is not symmetrical enough. "Frankly Mr Pedantic from Peterborough you can shove your flowers in an orifice, not any old office but a finely festering orifice where the suns rays can’t reach". NO MORE SORRY.
Lazy trips down the Mekong Delta, golden sandy beaches, lush green paddy fields, remnants of ancient civilisations, reminders of colonial splendour. Soon I will be a free man, escaping before I become institutionalised. On September 28th the steel bird of freedom awaits on terminal 2.